Sunday, March 18, 2018

kelly kelly kelly kelly


Remember that little song from "Cheers"? The one that Woody wrote for his girlfriend?
It was her birthday and he couldn't afford to buy anything for the rich blonde.
Wait, let me find it ... here it is!



Delightfully sweet, isn't it?
(smile)

Still, it brings to mind another blonde named Kelly... Kelly Bundy.
She may have been too worldly for our literal-minded barkeep, though.
Please note that I said "worldly", but not wise.
(smile)
Like Woody,she had a habit of saying things that were not quite right.
I'd been in the habit of recording "Married With Children" so I could watch the episodes at a more reasonable time. I may be a night owl, but I'm not up that late!
Then Comcast discovered they had sent me the wrong box. Apparently, my account wasn't supposed to have "saving" capability. They wanted to charge me another twenty dollars per month for their mistake; however, I balked at the strong-arm tactic and they backed off, with the understanding that I was to never use the save-for-later feature again.
Sigh.
What brought all this to mind?
Well, on Friday, I woke up around 7 AM... and could not go back to sleep. What to do? Watch an episode of "Married With Children", of course! It happened to have a bit of baseball in it - hooray! This was the one where Al is told that Jefferson D'Arcy was CIA and confronts him about it. After Jefferson tries to play on Al's friendship ("You're a Bundy - and when you replace the 'n' with a 'd', you're a buddy.) to no avail, things get a bit dangerous. That's when Al tries to convince his neighbor that he is no threat ("I'm a bunny, replace the 'd' with an 'n'.), making little rabbit ears on his head with his hands.
Really funny!
But there was no Kelly in the episode.
I missed her.
So, I dragged out the bits of paper on which I had recorded some of her witticisms.
Here they are, for the amusement of all!
For a laugh, see if you can figure out what she meant to say.
(smile)

***** ***** *****

That is the squaw that stroked the camel's sac.

That's cool and unusable punishment, even for Daddy.

Veritable coronary-copia of your favorites!

Squid pro quo.

When you said "push him to the park", I probably should have put him in the stroller.

I know I'm just a local mascot now, but with a little luck I can be a dancing fruit in someone's underwear.

So this might be my answer to my search for the holy pail!

So, your story is an allegory, a meta-mucil, if you will.

When the people see my face in these commercials, the offers will rain down like hats and pogs!

I know what today is. It's the bright sunny part before tonight.

Kelly: I'm under court order to burn this uniform.
Peg: Remember to take it off first.
Kelly: Thanks, Mom!

***** ***** *****

Thanks, Christina Applegate, for a stellar delivery of those lines!

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