Thursday, June 6, 2019

grateful for the rain

My eyes almost look black instead of their usual hazel-blue-green medley.
That's because both pupils were dilated about 4 PM.
By the time I was released an hour later, I still had to be mindful of bright lights until at least 8 PM, provided my pupils would be good and return to normal in the typical four-hour span.
How could I possibly drive three hours back to Savannah in this condition?
No worries.

My angels were mindful of that need for muted lighting.
How could I tell?
The skies had changed from bright and sunny to completely overcast.
A mild rain was even falling, to blur the headlights of oncoming traffic.
Plus, the contrast was low between those lights and the light level of late afternoon.
I was able to simply wear my sunglasses for the rush-hour traffic in Charleston.
i thank You, God.

This trip to the Ralph H. Johnson VA Hospital had not been long in the planning. The call from them had come late yesterday morning. My request for Community Care had been denied. That meant the ophthalmology appointment that I had awaited for a month would now have to be in South Carolina.
My options had been to take this appointment or wait until after my trip to Florida. Well, that trip with my eldest niece and her family had been planned since mid-April.
I accepted the 3:30 PM time slot and decided to try to enjoy the hand I was dealt.
Attitude, after all, makes a big difference in stress level.
i thank You, God.

I left town immediately after my weigh-in at WW.
That was good, as there was much road construction in South Carolina.
However, because I left early, I had that extra time in my favor.
I was checked in at the Hospital by 3:00 PM.
That gave me time to grab a small garden salad from the Canteen before I settled in to wait my turn in Module 5.
I was blessed to sit across from a woman whose husband was off on his appointment. She and I had a very pleasant conservation while I dined. As I finished my last bite, her husband returned and they left.
Such excellent timing!
i thank You, God.

I was called into the assistant's office not much later.
She asked questions to verify what had happened to me on May 5th.
Then began the battery of vision tests... but first, my eyes were dilated.
I had expected that, but part of me had hoped I would not need it.
The dilation was definitely needed, to determine the level of clarity of my vision.
Most of her tests were the typical ones by optometrists.
First, the projected chart had four lines of letters in different font sizes and I was to pick the line I could most easily read.
We began with my right eye.
Oops! So she found out right away that my vision there is not right! I could see the four lines, but I could only read part of the top line, missing the identity of all but the first and last of the five letters.
That was no news to me, of course.
As I told her, that eye has had a blind spot since I was "11 or 12 years old." (In truth, it's been since I was about 9 years old, back in 1967, with that partial solar eclipse.)
When we switched to my left eye, all was well.
She also had me go through the "which one is better" with the lens-swapping device. I was relieved when that was done, as it was quite a strain on me.
Next up was scans of each eye via optical coherence tomography. That required me to focus on bright green asterisk-like symbol in a field of moving red lines, remaining very still during the actual scan. The assistant had to repeat the scans of my right eye several times, as my focus would drift.
Finally, it was time to see Dr. Charles Beischel, the ophthalmologist himself. He discussed the test results with me, basically telling me that the tests had been negative for macular degeneration or retinal detachment.
That was good news!
The OCT had revealed that my right eye has a macular pucker, giving a name to the centralized blind spot I already knew was there. He told me that surgery at this point most likely would not alter my vision.
That was good news!
My optic nerves have "bling", apparently. The OCT showed them with yellow spots, indicating the genetic condition optic nerve head drusen. Apparently, those golden discs have not been linked to any particular health risks, they're just "there".
That was good news!
i thank You, God!

So, what had caused the optic migraine I had experienced?
Nothing concerning my eyes or vision, thankfully.
What should I do to prevent having another episode?
Well, this type of migraine is more often a result of extreme stress.
That meant I should avoid allowing myself to become overly anxious about anything.
In other words, I need to follow the Tibetan saying.

If the problem can't be solved,
there's no use worrying about it.
If the problem can be solved,
then worrying will do no good.


Amen to that reminder of a Post-It I have had many years.

Then I found myself released from the good doctor's care, free to do whatever else.
The sky was completely overcast and a light rain was beginning.
I had initially planned to go see a movie at a nearby Regal Cinema. I was due a free birthday movie and was wanting to see the latest dog movie, which I had missed in town.
I had even pulled up those directions in Nuvi once I was in my car.
Then I had a vivid mental image of me driving through the night afterward, being blinded by overly bright truck and SUV headlights on the dark, black top, highway.
I programmed Nuvi to take me to "home" instead... and felt more relaxed immediately.
Even though I had the Charleston rush-hour traffic to deal with, at least it was under cloudy skies and in late afternoon.
Even though I had the glare of oncoming headlights, those lights were muted by the cover of raindrops on my windows.
Even though I had lights of all types behind and around me, those lights blended in with the general light of the waning day.
i thank You, God.

27 comments:

faustina said...

I am so grateful to be so blessed with loving family and friends!
I posted the following on fb on Thursday, not sure if I should... and I am so glad I did.
I would never have known how my story touched and related to others' tales if I had not "used my words", as Kevin says. :-)

"Yesterday I drove to the VA Hospital in Charleston for an ophthalmology appointment
as a follow-up to my emergency room visit on May 5. Dr. Beischel ran a number of
tests to determine whether I had damage to my optic nerves or the blood supply for my eyes.
The good news: the tests all revealed no damage!
The bad news: no one knows why I had the optic migraine and no one knows when I might have another.
Thank God I was driving home under cloudy skies and in a light rain. That made my return much
easier on my dilated eyes. Amazing how things work out!"

So far, that post has had acknowledgements by Bunny Jones Roberts, JinHi Soucy Rand and 52 others, as well as numerous comments.

Anne said...

June 6, 2019

Anne El-Habre: Optic migraines are no fun. Glad nothing was damaged!

Cynthia said...

June 6, 2019

Cyndi Dyches-Linthicum: Girl you should have called me! I would have gone with you! Next time!

me: I have to return there in December, so I just may call you on that. I'm hoping the Savannah VA Clinic will be able to take me by that time.

running bear said...

June 6, 2019

Kevin Crabtree: I’m glad you’re home safely.

Tom said...

June 6, 2019

Tom Nelson: A shame that you have to go to Charleston.

me: The Savannah VA Clinic has an ophthalmologist, but they were backed up for too long. I'm hoping to change my check-up in December to the local clinic.

Danielle said...

June 6, 2019

Danielle McFadden: Prof. Smith I'm sorry to learn of your ER visit, however I'm happy to know you are doing okay now and let's pray and agree no more migraines.

me: Amen to that!

aka Patrick said...

June 6, 2019

Tony O'Conner: Keeping you in my thoughts!

Caroline hvj said...

June 6, 2019

Caroline Switzer Verner: So glad to hear there was no damage to your eyes. Hopefully, you will not have another optic migraine. Sometimes people have one, and never have another one.

me: That's what I'm hoping. I wish I knew what might have triggered that one, so I would know what to NEVER do again.

Aunt Linda said...

June 6, 2019

Linda L. Walker: I give thanks for the findings and I pray for no future problems. I am glad you sought expert help.

Betsy said...

June 6, 2019

Betsy Provost Kameron: Seems like you are Looking through cut glass?

me: My pupils were SO dilated that the lights seemed overly bright.

Betsy Provost Kameron: Wow! never had that.

Sue of Canada! said...

June 6, 2019

Sue Kosokowsky: That is freakin Awesome. <3 I'm freakin glad nothing was seriously wrong. Love ya Sista!

cuzn Michelle said...

June 6, 2019

Michelle Davidson: Glad you are well!

Pat of amumc said...

June 7, 2019

Pat Andres: Yay!

Susan said...

June 7, 2019

Susan Goodwin: I have those periodically. Pretty scary when I first had them. Now I have learned how to keep them from going to full blown migraine and they go away in about 10-20 minutes by putting a cool rag over my eyes in a dark room and sit back or lay down. Glad you're okay!

me: I thought I was having a stroke. Sudden tunnel vision with jagged sunburst fringe, followed by intense pain in right temple that migrated over the whole right side of my head. Never had a migraine like this before and never want another.

Susan of mensa said...

June 7, 2019

Susan Small Daggett: I have had them, also, but only in times of great stress. I fortunately haven't had one in many years. The first time was the scariest, of course, and I had to have a colleague drive me to the hospital from work. It had actually cleared by the time we got to the hospital. They just said to see an ophthalmologist (spelling?) if it happened again, which I did. He explained it was a spasm of the optic nerve, brought on by a stressful situation. The remaining times I simply found a place to sit quietly until
it passed. I was very fortunate all the times because I only got a dull headache, not a full-blown migraine headache. So now I am curious - were you under stress when it happened?
Or was it spontaneous?

me: I was pretty stressed out and being pulled in too many directions for events I really didn't want to attend, but felt obligated. I'm going to avoid that situation in the future.

Julie said...

June 7, 2019

Julie Shead: hey, hope you get better soon with that.

outlaw Bunny said...

June 7, 2019

Bunny Jones Roberts: Wow! Sounds pretty scary. Prayers!

me: It was terrifying. I was so scared I was having a stroke. As I recall, Grandma Pooh had her first one right about my age.

Aunt Barbara said...

June 7, 2019

Barbara Narcarti: Sorry you have been having troubles, hope it will clear up and not ever return. Praying for you. Aunt Barbara.

Reggie said...

June 7, 2019

Regina Coveney: I'm surprised you could drive home at all :(

me: Honestly, if the day had not turned from sunny to clouded over and raining, I would not have been able to and would have been stuck in Charleston. Thank God for the rain when I needed it!

Robbie said...

June 7, 2019

Robbie Prouty Rush: I'll be praying for you, cuz.

Deb of hanza said...

June 7, 2019

Deb Thomas: Whoa! I hope you never experience this ever again. Yikes!

Gene said...

June 7, 2019

Gene Perrone: The "good news" is terrific! So glad you didn't incur any damage to your optic nerve. What a blessing!

Lynn said...

June 7, 2019

Lynn Engler: I get them infrequently but when I first "see" the aura I take two ibuprofen and drink caffeine. Voila no headache!!

me: That's what my doctor says she does, too. She gets them infrequently, she told me, but she goes for the coffee right away when she does.

blue-sky Penny said...

June 7, 2019

Penny Walker Bos: Great news, Tina! I'll call this wkend to catch up.

Margaret of amumc said...

June 8, 2019

Margaret Clay Oh jeepers!! I hope you find relief. I might have something that could help....

Faustina Smith Thanks. Actually, the migraine part was just a "dull roar", so I could handle that. The eye issue was terrifying, though. I hope to never have it again.

bfm Lizz said...


Lizz Smith
June 10 at 1:26 AM

Faustina Smith, this is true! ANY DAY ABOVE GROUND IS A GOOD DAY!

= Zach said...

Zach Cobb
June 10 at 5:39 PM

Damn Tina! Take care of yourself.