barefoot hobo in the broken overalls

"Yo, girlie! You thinkin' 'bout going to that movie about Ralph and new Disney princess?"

That's not a bad idea, as it's been brought back to the cinemas. It's been nominated for an Oscar for Best Animated Feature! I wish the song had been nominated, too, but it was overlooked in favor of songs from movies with live people.

"Well, phooey."

Phooey. (smile) Funny word. Did you know that its origin was by German Jews?

"No, I did not. Did you know that girls wearing pink and boys wearing blue came from the French in the mid 1840's?"

Not until I heard the story on "CBS Sunday Morning" today. And, while you are correct about when the colors became gender-specific in France, it wasn't until about twenty years later that the notion landed in the States. That's when, as Valerie Steele said, "Americans decided that you could really make money out of color-coding children's clothes." Actually, I prefer to buy children clothes that are green or yellow or orange or purple...

"Gender-neutral colors. Ah got ya. Hey, remember Hai saying that all the time?"

What a coincidence that you bring him up! I saw him at church this morning. He kept having to get up to let Grady Mills by and I noticed that Hai was barefoot. I guess he had slipped off his flipflops.

"Flipflops in February???"

Hey, he's not the only one, you know. Remember that guy that wore them every day in lab? He gladly took the grade-point deduction for the safety violation, rather than wear closed-toe shoes.

"Yeah, I recall that guy... I can see his face in my mind, but not his name. Geez Louise, how long has that been?"

Years! Maybe even as many years as it's been since Hai Dang last spoke to me.

"Over that stupidity at The Distillery?"

Yeah, that certainly marks the date. It's hard to believe he would throw away eight years of friendship over something so trivial as that. After all, it was me that the restaurant disrespected, not him.
Sigh.
Maybe it's just as well. I had not realized how prejudiced he could be, but it sure shows up in some of his text messages.

"Hey, that could just be some of his act as a "long-suffering Asian among white people", you know? Remember, once a thespian..."

... always a thespian. Yeah, I guess. I just miss those fun times we had, like at Dave & Buster's following winter break of 2013 in his company. If not for that Jacksonville trip together, I might not have started collecting tickets for rewards there. That would mean I wouldn't have my TBBT Trivia game, either, and would have missed out on creating The Schrödinger Card with Paul & Cathy and the Peace Guy. What great fun!
Speaking of great fun, I have to add that time Hai took me out for a steak dinner and - drum roll, please! - 17hundred90! He didn't even deem his girlfriend steak-dinner worthy! LOL!

"Don't forget that old television he gave you! That was pretty close to that expensive dinner, wasn't it?"

Yes, it was, and followed his 34th birthday, when I gave him that original "Silencer" comic book, from my kickstarter stash. I'd had the book exactly six months when I gave it to him. What fortuitous timing! He had very much appreciated that gift.
I had simply wanted to let him know how much his friendship meant to me, especially after that rough year I'd had. Six deaths in 2013.

"Then you had another six dead by November of 2017."

Yeah, another rough year for sure.
But I didn't have Hai to help me through that holiday season, like I did in 2013.
This year certainly started off a bit rough, too, with Arlene's death.

"Listen, I know you miss seeing movies with him and talking dingbat. I know you do. But maybe, just maybe, he was in your life so much then to help you through a very difficult time. You mentioned that y'all had been friends for eight years, but how much face time had you two actually spent until that period in 2013 and 2014?"

Just what are you saying? That he was "a friend for a reason", like in that poem?

"Yes, that's what I'm saying. Take a moment and read it. Please."

Okay. Give me a second or two.
*
*
*
*
"Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end."
I see what you mean.
All this time, I've thought I had offended him.
Instead, I think he just needed a break and didn't know how to do it any other way.
Now, it seems that perhaps my persistence of late in trying to get him to acknowledge my presence at the cinema, at shows, at church... has that been wrong of me?

"Maybe so, dear."

Wow.
I had not even considered this as the reason for his break from me.

"Please do so. I know how frustrating it has been to see him at the cinema and have him steadily looking down at his phone. He even did that with Carolyn beside you. This cold war he has been waging has been quite wearing on her, too. She shouldn't have to feel that she has to choose between the two of you."

She is not the only one in the middle. I think Chad may be there, too, now that he is part of the WRUU Sunday show with Hai and Bill Cooper. Bless Bill Cooper and his wife, they were at the Secondhand Laughs improv on Thursday, as was Hai. Bill pretty much said in his stand-up routine that night that life was too short to be around people who didn't appreciate you... looking at me as he said it. I knew right then what he was saying: I should write off my close friendship with the Asian.
Damn.
All this time I've been trying to fix something that didn't even exist anymore.

"Hey, as Jim Metzger told you on the Hanza site, you've always been one of the nicest people he knew. Andrew has told you that, too. So has Paul. So has the bfe. That's more that three people saying the same thing, with some of them knowing you for more than three decades. More than three people with the same message means the message is true."

Yes, I know that rule. I've even voiced it a time or two.
(Sigh.)

"So what are you going to do about this?"

Well, I'm not going to childishly pretend he's dead.

"No, that's been his approach and his words."

Okay.
Okay.
How about I send him a thank you card for his past friendship? I can also tell him that I won't approach him as a close friend anymore, but I am keeping him as a treasured acquaintance.

"Um... that sounds pretty close to what Sheldon said when he was moving to Boseman."

Oh, you caught that, did you? Do you think he would?

"Maybe... maybe. If he does, that might make him smile and that would be good."

Yes, it really would.

"Okay, try that if you want. Just don't be surprised if he gives no response."

Well, I'm going to tell Carolyn what I'm doing, so she'll at least be prepared. I'm not going to mention the TBBT reference, as she won't get that. I'll just let her know I've sent him a thank-you card for the massive amounts of friendship time during those six months or so in 2013 and 2014.

"Yes, let her know. Maybe he'll say something to her about it, maybe he won't. Remember that this is not grade school and she is not in charge of relaying messages between y'all."

Yes, ma'am.

"Good. Now, time to join her and Barbara at those Oscar shorts! You've been at this too long!"

Oh, my, is that the time?! Most def time for me to go!
Thank you for the listening ear.
I tell you, true: I sure do miss Mama.

"I know you do. Get moving now, you've been at this for almost three hours."

Off to the JEA and CinemaSavannah.
I am so blessed to have this beach to walk on...
i thank You, God.