no, i'm laughing WITH you

Before I forget... here's a funny story for you.
No, really... it's a hoot.
Hoot, hoot!
Here's the set up: I was returning from north Georgia trip yesterday evening. The bfe was off at a friend's house, playing cards (i.e., getting drunk whilst bidding hearts and spades).
Now... GO!

Date: Sunday, July 16.

me, 8:07 pm, to bfe: "May not make it home. Pulled over for bad rain about twenty miles north of Macon."
me, 8:45 pm, to bfe and ex: "Got a room in Forsyth. Will leave in the morn for home."

bfe, 9:07 pm: "Is your address 621 derenne?"

me, 9:15 pm, to bfe: "seven four one Fine Glen Road"
then, three minutes later: "What? You lost?"

bfe, 9:31 pm: "No. I am good!"

*****
I then settle in to watch "Beetlejuice" on the television and eat my dinner. I've had a nice, relaxing shower, found a favorite movie (the one with the "Day-O" song used at the Savannah Bananas games) and life is good!
At least it was until I got the following.
*****

bfe, 10:15 pm: "Oh f***, when do you think you may be home?"

me, finally seeing the message at 11:00 pm, to bfe: "I got a room in Forsyth. The weather was too bad for me to drive. I will be home tomorrow."

bfe, 11:01 pm: "My car has been stolen and I can't get in."

me, 11:02 pm, to bfe: "Where was your car? Oh no! Call Smitty and he can let you in the house."

bfe, 11:03 pm: "It was in the driveway. I have a key and I still can't get in."

me, 11:03 pm, to bfe: "At my house??"

bfe, 11:04 pm: "The lock is messed up."

me, 11:04 pm, to bfe: "The lock to my house?"

bfe, 11:05 pm: "Yeah. I can't get the key in."

me, 11:06 pm, to bfe: "Are you sure you are using the right key?"

bfe, 11:07 pm: "I only have one key!"

me, 11:08 pm, to bfe: "I don't know what to do from here. Please call Smitty and he can come. I am 4 hours away."

bfe, 11:10 pm: "It is ok. I am going to call the police after L___ arrives."

me, 11:11 pm, to bfe: "Seriously, I can call Smitty if you want."

bfe, 11:11 pm: "I'll stay the night with L___ here in Savannah. I assume it will take you to get back in since I am not a legal resident."

me, 11:12 pm, to bfe: "Again, I can call my brother and have him let you in the house."

bfe, 11:15 pm: "I have a key. It won't let me in. It seems like something is rammed in the lock."

me, 11:16 pm, to bfe: "Ok. Does it look like someone broke in? This is so crazy."

bfe, 11:17 pm: "It seems like someone f***ed up the lock."

me, 11:19 pm, to bfe: "Well then the police definitely need to be called. You are definitely a resident of the house and they can call me to confirm. Also I am sure your possessions in the house will verify that you live there."

bfe, 11:21 pm: "I am having L___ come here first and then I am calling the police!"

me, 11:21 pm, to bfe: "Ok. Ok. This seems like some bad dream."

bfe, 11:24 pm: "Yeah. It sucks right."

me, 11:25 pm, to bfe: "You know, I can't believe it. Too surreal."

bfe, 11:26 pm: "Yeah. This is really weird."

me, 11:29 pm, to bfe: "If I had not stopped for the rain, I would have been getting there in another hour. That would have been crazy. Plus I would not have been able to text you about all of this. Surreal."

THE EX, 11:30 pm, TO ME: "Wow, still clear here."

me, 11:33 pm, to THE EX: "Apparently someone tried to break into the house. The physicist is waiting for the police. His car was stolen too. I have no idea what the hell is going on."

THE EX, 11:34 pm, TO ME: "Oh my God! Was he in the house at the time?"

bfe, 11:34: "Tell me how I should reference your place to the police."

me, 11:35 pm, to THE EX: "Right? Surreal. No way to know yet if anything has been stolen. I think he was at a friend's house playing cards."

me, 11:36 pm, to bfe: "I do not understand what you mean."

THE EX, 11:38 pm, TO ME: "I am so sorry. Let me know when you know something."

bfe, 11:39 pm: "What is the address I should use?"

me, 11:40 pm, to THE EX: "Will do. This is crazy, I am so exhausted or I would be tempted to leave for home. That's 4 hours away."

bfe, 11:40 pm: "152 Forestland"

me, 11:40 pm, to bfe: "No."

bfe, 11:41 pm: "For some reason I think no."

me, 11:42 pm, to bfe: "741 Fine Glen Road"

bfe, 11:42 pm: "152 Fine Glen?"

me, 11:43 pm, to bfe: "N O"
me, 11:43 pm, to bfe: "741 Fine Glen Road"

bfe, 11:44 pm: "Wait. Have I been at the wrong place!"

me, 11:44 pm, to bfe: "Oh my God."

bfe, 11:54 pm: "Wait."
bfe, 11:54 pm: "I am lost."
bfe, 11:54 pm: "Oh I am at the wrong place."

me, 11:54 pm, to bfe: "So... are you in the house now? Is all ok? Your car still there?"

bfe, 11:54 pm: "I am so embarrassed."

me, 11:54 pm, to bfe: "You are in the house now? I can go to sleep?"

bfe, 11:54 pm: "I am ok doll. But again I am so embarrassed."

me, 11:55 pm, to bfe: "Hey, as long as you are ok..."

me, 11:56 pm, to THE EX: "Well, guess what? He was at the wrong address. :-) "

bfe, 12:15 AM: "You can go to sleep. I am silly."

me, 12:15 AM, to bfe: "Love you still :-) "

bfe, 12:16 AM: "Thank you. I love you too. I feel so embarrassed."

***** ***** ***** ***** *****

This morning, I drove back to Savannah, passing in and out of brief showers.
I arrived safely home during pouring rain and looked at my phone.
I had a message patiently awaiting a response.

THE EX, 11:44 AM: "I don't quite understand. Your house wasn't broken into?"

me, 1:00 pm: "Apparently not. He was at the wrong house."
me, 1:00 pm: "Yes, one day this will be very humorous."

THE EX, 1:02 pm: "So he was picked up by the friend to go play cards - then told the friend to go to the wrong house? Is that why the car was missing too?"

me, 1:04 pm: "Apparently. Or maybe he used Uber. I just got home and am going to have lunch and watch the rain."

THE EX, 1:05 pm: "Let me get it all straight - the car isn't missing and the home wasn't broken into. Who's home was broken into, someone in the neighborhood nearby?"

me, 1:06 pm: "No ones. His car was in the driveway when he finally got HERE."

THE EX, 1:08 pm: "Oh, the break-in was just assumed because the car was missing?"

me, 1:09 pm: "Apparently. Plus, his key was not working."

***** ***** ***** ***** *****

Really, one day this is going to be a hoot...
By the way, the addresses have been altered for anonymity.
(smile)